Cathy Cress

Expert in Aging Life and Geriatric Care Management

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Ten Warning Signs You Are Working With a Dysfunctional Family

November 3, 2022

Working with Dysfunctional Family

Ten Warning Signs you are Working with Dysfunctional Family represents critical information to share with long-distance caregivers before their holiday visit. Do you know them? They include contentiousness, anger, and cut off and all are listed below. These clinical issues give the visiting caregiver signs that they need to call a care manager and you the care manager the most challenging job of an aging professional. What you have to know is family system theory and be clinically skilled in entering this treacherous family system – to get care for an older person

1. Contentiousness – Old fights erupt; the siblings and parents get into arguments with one another about an old issue

2. Anger – Siblings and family members express physical anger, emotional abuse, financial abuse

3. Distancing & cut off – Some siblings or parents have nothing to do with family and may not speak to parents or siblings for long periods of time.

Ten Warning Signs You are Working with the  Dysfunctional Family – Fusion, Denial, Triangulation, Entitlement

4. Fusion – Siblings and family members, such as the mother and eldest daughter, blend into one another, For example, the daughter sounds, acts, and has the same prejudices as the mother. . Think of the media’s portrayal of Lindsay Lohan and her mother.

5. Denial – Adult siblings do not see a decline in a parent, do not face reality, and do not take care of parent if he or she needs care.                           

6. Triangulation – Tension between two family members or siblings causes one to enlist a third family member or sibling to avoid change For example, two adult sibling object to the cost of care of an aging parent. They gang up on the third adult sibling who thinks the cost of care is reasonable and justified.

7. Sense of Entitlement – Siblings who are accustomed to purchasing services need not personally solve their own, children’s siblings or parents’ problems. This lack of engagement leaves them, unprepared and unwilling in getting involved in solving family tribulations.

Ten Warning Signs You Are Working with a Dysfunctional Family – Narcissism, Needy Adult Siblings, Substance Abuse, and Cut Off

8. Narcissism – One or more siblings has an “it’s all about me” attitude and

other siblings resent this. The self-absorbed sibling either does not participate

9. Needy Adult Siblings – These adult siblings feel starved for affection and often seek affection from professionals and other people in their lives for compensation for the care they didn’t receive as children.

10 . Substance and Other Abuse – The family and siblings have a history of drug, alcohol, and/or child abuse.

If this fits you you and your aging parent needs care may need to contact a geriatric care manager.

SIGN UP FOR MY HOLIDAY WEBINAR –

 

Get Ready for the Holiday Rush

Get Ready for the Holiday Rush

WEDNESDAY, November 16th, 2022, FROM 2 PM – 3:30 PM PST

 Learn how to create!

  • Pre-Holiday Social media campaigns to reach worried caregivers
  • Pre- Holiday-Materials about the warning signs that a parent needs help
  • Pre-Holiday Marketing to help you sign up families who might face a serious decline in aging parents
  • How to sell services to desperate post-holiday callers from Normal dysfunctional & long-distance family
  • How to use tools to contain holiday chaos & arrange care in festive family fright
  • How to move the family to New Year’s stability
  • Know The Ten Warning Signs you are working with a dysfunctional family and position Your Agency ahead of Care Managers who do not have great pre-holiday marketing campaigns and lack the clinical skills how to work with Adult Children and families during the chaotic aging family holiday visit when adult kids find their aging parents need care
  • Featuring

 Cathy Cress MSW author of the Handbook of Geriatric Care

Management     

Find Out More 

 

 

 

  • Find out more in the YouTube for My YouTube, Channel  Geriatric Care 1

 

 

Filed Under: abusive aging parents, adult child physical abuse, Adult children, aging family crisis, aging family system, Aging Life Care, Aging Life Care Assocaition, Aging therapist, Dysfunctional aging family, Dysfunctional Family Inquiry, Dysfunctional Family System, elder abuse, elder care manager, elder fiscal abuse, elder mediator, entitled family, estranged siblings, FREE WEBINAR, GCM COACHING SKILLS, geriatric care manager, geriatric care manager start up, midlife siblings, Siblings Tagged With: adult children of borderline narcissistic VIP families, aging family, black american geriatric care managers, black american social workers, Black Entrepreneurs, Black geriatric care managers, Black RN's, Black start-up geriatric care management, Black travel nurses, blaming familiy members, boundaries dysfunctional families, Clinical Tools Dysfunctional Holiday, cut -off, cut-off sibling, dysfunctional aging family, geriatric care manager, help with dysfunctional family, midlife siblings, Narcissistic Personality, sibling, Substance abuse in the elderly

How to Help Avoid a Cat and Dog fight Among the Dysfunctional Family On Holidays

November 1, 2022

cat-dog-fight.jpg

Sparring Cats and Dogs AKA Siblings

Learn how to calm the chaos of the dysfunctional family on the holiday.  During the coming holiday season, especially after some liquid cheer, sour step-parents, angry step-siblings, and mid-life adult kids who grew -up in a dysfunctional family can spin into sparring cats and dogs with teeth bared at Thanksgiving Hannaka, Christmas dinner. Sign -up for my  holiday webinar

 Why Their Stocking is Full of Coal

As if COVID has not made the holidays hard enough for family gatherings, the ordinary

 

aging processes are made far tougher when a family has a history of dysfunction. The holidays are red meat for a dysfunctional family. Aging professionals, like geriatric care managers, have their greatest challenges in working with these “difficult” families.

Dysfunctional families are not able to organize themselves

Dysfunctional Familiy on the holidays

They effectively face gut-wrenching eldercare challenges and crises. These families are under more stress as they move from long-established roles into uncharted territory. the dysfunctional family on holidays like Thanksgiving can face an emotional detonation then an explosion with siblings laying into each other not the turkey.

 Why Cut-OFF Ruins the Celebration 4The Dysfunctional family on holidays

The dysfunctional family on the holidays faces shunning or cutoff. What if adult kids “ cut off” their Dad years ago and now he had a severe stroke- what do they do when caught between I hate you and now I love you. One sibling has taken over Mom or Dad’s care and her/his dysfunctional midlife adult siblings just don’t want her to do this. It only takes a few drinks at dinner  and snarky remarks start a fracas that leads to cut-off, which leads to them not sharing in Mom’s care, overloading the sibling caregiver, and endangering Mom’s care, through this shunning.

 

Now that the holidays are soon arriving – they have the same attitude about attending the family Thanksgiving dinner.

 

 

Dysfunctional family on holidays

SIGN UP FOR MY FREE HOLIDAY WEBINAR –

 

WEDNESDAY, November 16th, 2022, FROM 2 PM – 3:30 PM PST

 Learn how to create marketing to alert adult children you are there

  • Pre-Holiday Social media campaigns to reach worried caregivers
  • Pre- Holiday-Materials about the warning signs that a parent needs help
  • Pre-Holiday e-newsletters, podcasts, speakers bureau, blogs-to market

Learn clinical skills to covert and tools to serve frantic adult children and their declining, resistant parents and the dysfunctional family on the holiday

  • How to sell services to desperate post-holiday callers from Normal dysfunctional & long-distance family
  • How to use tools to contain sibling holiday chaos & arrange care in festive family fright
  • How to move the family to New Year’s stability
  • Position Your Agency ahead of Care Managers who do not have great pre-holiday marketing campaigns and lack the clinical skills how to work with the dysfunctional family or nearly normal family during the holidays
  • Featuring

 Cathy Cress MSW author of the Handbook of Geriatric Care

Management        

 

 

  • Dysfunctional family on holidays

 

 

SIGN UP FOR MY FREE HOLIDAY WEBINAR –

 

 

 

Find out more in the YouTube for My YouTube, Channel  Geriatric Care 1

 

 

 

Filed Under: ADULT SIBling, Aging, aging family crisis, aging life business, Aging Life Care, Aging Life Care Assocaition, aging life care manager, Aging therapist, black care manager, black concieirge nurse, black concierge care manager, black concierge RN, Black Entrepreneur RN, Black Geriatric Care Manager, Blog, Care Management Inquiry Call, care manager, case manager, Dysfunctional aging family, Dysfunctional Family & Holidays, elder care manager, estranged siblings, Families, GCM Sales, Geriatric Care Management Business, geriatric care manager, Geriatric Care Manager, geriatric social worker, Holiday Meltdown in Aging Family, Holiday Rituals in Aging Family, Holiday Rush Technology, Holiday season, Holiday Sibling Rivalry, Holiday Social Media, Holiday Webinar, Holidays, inquiry call, Long Distance Care, Long Distance Care Holidays, Long distance caregiver, Marketing during Holidays, nurse advocate, nurse care manager, POST HOLIDAY CALLS, POST HOLIDAY SEASON, SIBLING, sibling rivalry, Sibling Strife Holidays, Sibling Strife Thanksgiving, Siblings, Social Media Holidays, social media marketing, technology for long distance care, Telehealth with GCM, Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving & dysfunctional family, Thanksgiving and COVID, THANKSGIVING BLOG, Thanksgiving Parent crisis, Thanksgiving Safe Visits to Grandma, Therapist Specializing in Aging, Webinar Tagged With: aging dysfunctional family, aging family, aging life care manager, aging life care on holidays, aging parent care, aging parent Thanksgiving, alcohol on the holidays, black aging family, black american geriatric care managers, black american social workers, Black Entrepreneurs, Black geriatric care managers, Black Nurse Entrepreneurs, Black start-up geriatric care management, Black travel nurses, care manager, case manager, COVID THANKSGIVING VISIT, danger signs for holiday visit, drunken holiday, dysfunctional family on the holiday, dysfuntional family, Dysfuntional family on holidays, GRANDMA VISIT THANKSGIVING, Holiday sibling rivalry, Holidays Crisis in aging family, nurse advocate, nurse care manager, post holiday parent care, Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving Webinar, Thanksgiving with dysfunctional family, Thanksgiving with midlife siblings

The Holiday Season is Upon Us & Can Be Caregiver Hell

October 21, 2022

Adult children usually see their elderly parents soon on Christmas, Hanukkah, and Thanksgiving- all major holidays.

The Holiday Season is upon us. Thanksgiving, Hannukkah, and Christmas are all coming up when families gather around ritual gatherings. Adult children can notice their aging parents’ struggling with memory, and speech, and preparing those ritual meals. Then midlife siblings may be alarmed by any behaviors that threaten the normal order they always experienced.

When The Holiday Season is upon us ,the discussion will turn to aging parents. Thanksgiving usually involves alcohol. With a normal family, discussing this when alcohol is involved may or may not be a good idea. In an aging long-distance family, this would be the time to set up a family meeting via teleconference or Skype when everyone is sober. You could just ask everyone if would gather ideas and you can discuss it at that time.

With elderly parent’s decline- everyone’s independence is threatened and anger and frustration can be rampant.

If adult siblings did make a  visit to elderly parents before Thanksgiving, it could have been bitter or sweet or it was just plain scary. This is why it is best to set up a post-thanksgiving meeting with all the siblings to discuss care, not when people are drinking more than they should on Thanksgiving.

 

 Adult children may decide they must intercede or offer direct help, even if it is rejected. Then family members who do not live nearby become long-distance care providers, joining 7 million others in the US.

Offer to Facilitate a Telephonic Family Meeting After Thanksgiving

The frightening part often happens when you haven’t seen an aging Mom or Dad for a while. If midlife siblings live long distance, making an occasional visit can set off alarms, especially if they find aging Mom or Dad has gone downhill. If they call you, offer to facilitate the call using your family meeting facilitation skills, to create an agenda with the family, and keep everyone on the topic of parental care in the here and now, rather than fracturing into an argument about the past or old family wounds. With a care manager as a facilitator, they will find your value.

Get Ready for the Holiday Rush
    • SIGN UP FOR MY HOLIDAY WEBINAR –

      The Holiday Season is upon us

      Get Ready for the Holiday Rush

      WEDNESDAY, November 16th, 2022, FROM 2 PM – 3:30 PM PST

       Learn how to create!

      • Pre-Holiday Social media campaigns to reach worried caregivers
      • Pre- Holiday-Materials about the warning signs that a parent needs help
      • Pre-Holiday Marketing to help you sign up families who might face a serious decline in aging parents
      • How to sell services to desperate  post-holiday callers from Normal dysfunctional & long-distance family
      • How to use tools to contain holiday chaos & arrange care in festive family fright
      • How to move the family to New Year’s stability
      • Position Your Agency ahead of Care Managers who do not have great pre-holiday marketing campaigns and lack the clinical skills how to work with Adult Children and families during the chaotic aging family holiday visit when adult kids find their aging parents need care
      • Featuring

       Cathy Cress MSW author of the Handbook of Geriatric Care

      Management        

      The Holiday Season is upon us.

       Find out more about how an Aging Life or Geriatric Care Manager can help.

  • Subscribe to my YouTube channel, Geriatric Care Management, at www.youtube.com/channel/UCaoHdozwS0RvKD23YPpuHIw

  • Visit my website at cathycress.com/

  • Follow me on Twitter at twitter.com/cathyjocress

Filed Under: Aging, Aging Alcohol Abuse, Aging Life Care, Aging Life Care Assocaition, aging life care manager, Blog, Christmas webinar, Dysfunctional Aging Familu, elder care manager, Families, Filial Crisis, Geriatric Care Management Business, Geriatric Care Manager, geriatric social worker, Grandchild gifts for grandma, Hanukkah Webinar, Long Distance Care, Long Distance Care Holidays, Marketing aging life care, Marketing during Holidays, marketing pitch, Marketing Strategy, marketing to long distance adult children, Nearly Normal Aging Family, New Years, nurse advocate, nurse care manager, Thanksgiving with Dysfuntional Family, Webinar ALCA GCM, Webinar care managers, Webinar COVID Safety Tagged With: aging family, Aging Life, aging life and geraitric care manager, aging life care, aging life care manager, alcohol on the holidays, Black, black aging family, black american geriatric care managers, black american social workers, Black Entrepreneurs, Black geriatric care managers, Black Nurse Entrepreneurs, Black RN's, Black travel nurses, care manager, case manager, crisis with aging parents, drinking on labor day, geriatric care manager, holidays with aging parents, Holidays with midlife siblings, Nearly Normal family inquiry holidays, nurse care manager, Thanksgiving Webinar, Thanksgiving with aging parents, Thanksgiving with dysfunctional family, Thanksgiving with midlife siblings

Why a Financial Planner Would Work With a Caremanager

September 20, 2022

 Why Would a Care Manager Work With a Financial Planner?

Why a financial planner would work with a caremanager and why do you need to know this? First, you need to create a practice that meets the needs of third-party referral sources like financial planners, and wealth managers. They both work with older adults to plan and then manage their retirement assets, which often involves future or present care management.

What is the difference between a wealth manager?  Forbes magazine suggests that wealth managers, who are actually a subset of financial planners, deal with high net wealth – perhaps the upper 2 %. Financial Managers deal with retirees who have large assets, not stratospheric wealth. However, they both help retirees plan their retirement, and part of that retirement becomes the cost of care as they age after retirement. Generally, clients who use a financial advisor are pre-planners so the care manager can help the financial planner and the client think through future care  situations in advance which helps the financial planner provide the advisor with a roadmap for potential expenses

But financial planners need to know what you will do to benefit their clients. This means how will you benefit their practice? On the feeding chain of referrals, financial planners can be an important source of income for your business. But you have to deliver what they need in benefits to make money.

Benefits and Features

.

Features and benefits are very different. Features often directly address common problems experienced by users. Benefits are the outcomes or results that users will experience by using your product or service – the very reason why a prospective customer becomes an actual customer.

Features Care Managers Bring to Financial Planners

Why a financial planner would work with a care manager is Financial Planners are not often experienced with the full cost of future health care expenses. A feature of a care manager practice is understanding Medicare and its severe limits on paying for long-term care. Care Managers understand approximately when ADLs and IADLs will get more difficult for seniors, leading them to need some level of private pay home care. They also know Medicare does not cover long-term care like Private Duty Home care.

A big feature is care managers can also assess the client’s level of competency to make financial decisions so the financial planner can gauge whether the client can make decisions about their own money.

Why would financial planners work with a care manager?

 

Biggest Feature Care Managers Bring to Financial

Planners

The biggest feature of a care manager working with a financial planner is they can offer their clients a one-to-one concierge future health care expense plan, estimating how much long-term care will cost over time for each individual financial planning client.

So the care manager benefits the financial Planner by personally, one-to-one- working with the financial advisor’s clients helping them make both a retirement plan that includes health care realities and listening to and including their own individual health care choices.

Care Management Benefits to Financial Planners

Financial Planners are pre-planners and the care managers can help the financial health care costs and tailor that future health care to the client’s choices to help them think through situations in advance helping provide the advisor a roadmap for potential expenses. Care Managers can collaborate to create a long-term care plan for clients who wish to move or need to move to a higher level of care. They can personally collaborate with the client to create a long-term care plan for clients who wish to stay at home as financial planner plans accordingly for the cost of care. The outcome or the benefit of the collaboration of the financial planner and care managers is a fulsome more accurate financial plan for the aging client combining health and wealth planning skills.

 

Why would financial planners work with a care manager?

This is like a care management benefit to a conservator. A geriatric care manager is a health professional who specializes in the physical and mental issues of an older person. So care managers benefit from a conservator or helping to map out the care of psychosocial and health care issues of older conservatees and what will be the cost of future care.

Sign Up for My Latest Free Webinar

Care Managers Marketing to Wealth Managers”

When September 27th, 2-3:30 PM Pacific

Sign-up Understand how to market to the target and you open the door to the top 5% of

Why would financial planners work with a care manager?

 Learn how to sell your services to the gatekeepers to the clients who can pay privately for long periods of time, when you deliver your gold standard care management services.

Wealth managers and trust officers will refer their VIP clients to you if you can sell care management benefits and features to their entitled clients,

 bring the right handouts and, do the perfect presentation with the winning pitch

When September 27th 2-3:30 PM Pacific

What you will learn


  • Why market to wealth managers, financial planners, and trust departments
  • The benefits and features GCM offers to wealth managers financial planners and trust departments
  • Who are top wealth managers
  • How do you find them, set up a meeting, what to bring, what to present with the perfect pitch

Interview with GCM Patrice Harrison who works with trusts – what they want in a GCM

 

Sign-Up for this free webinar

 

Free Webinar

Filed Under: Aging Family, aging life business, Aging Life Care, aging life care manager, Aging Life Products, ALCA start-up business, Benefits of Geriatric Care Management, Benefits to Conservators, Benefits to Guardians, Black Aging Family, Black Entrepreneur, Black Entrepreneur RB, Black Entrepreneur RN, Black entrepreneurs, Black Geriatric Care Manager, Black geriatric care managers, Blog, Care Management Products, care management start-up, cash flow, Conservator, Conservators, Dysfunctional aging family, elder care manager, elder fiscal abuse, Elderlaw Attorney, entrepreneur, entrepreneur business, entrepreneur care manager, entrepreneur RN, FREE MARKETING WEBINAR, FREE WEBINAR, GC< working with a conservator, GCM Benefits, GCM Start -Up, GCM Webinar, GCM working with a conservator, GCM Working With Aging Family, Geriatric Care Management Business, geriatric care manager, Geriatric Care Manager, geriatric social worker, Guardian, Guardians, Legal Guardian, Marketing aging life care, marketing care management, marketing to concierge clients, marketing to conservators, marketing to guardians, marketing to the top 10$, nurse advocate, Start-up Marketing, Starting care management business, Third Party Referral, webinar Features vs Benefits Tagged With: aging family, Aging Life Care Association, aging life care manager, aging parent crisis, benefits of ALCA, Benefits of care management, Benefits Of Geriatric Care Managers, black american geriatric care managers, black american social workers, Black Entrepreneurs, Black geriatric care managers, Black Nurse Entrepreneurs, Black start-up geriatric care management, Black travel nurses, care manager, conservatorship, Features and Benefits, Features and Benefits of GCM, Features and Benefits of geriatric care management, geriatric care management, guardianship, markerting to conservators, marketing aging life or geriatric carre management, Marketing Care Management, marketing tactics, marketing to 3rd parties, marketing to guardians, marketing to trust officers, nurse advocate, nurse care manager

Do You Want a new Affordable Geriatric Care Management Manual ?

June 23, 2022

New Low-Cost Subscription To Purchase My Affordable  GCM Operations Manual

Introducing my new affordable subscription model , giving entrepreneurs and professionals who want to start a care management agency an affordable Care management manual a low-cost way to begin or grow their business.

You can now purchase my Affordable Care Management ManualGeriatric Care in its 5th edition at a low-cost monthly subscription price. You can pay a small amount monthly and access the entire manual online to learn how to deliver 15 key geriatric care management products services step by step

The Features of my subscription price for my affordable Care Management Manual
15 Care Management  Services or Products
A separate Forms Manual with 54 integrated forms  
Electronic PDF so you can edit.

 

Check out my cost-effective subscription program  which allows you to pay $65.00 a month for 11 months and access the entire manual  online

 

 

 

 6 reasons why your start-up business or restart GCM/ALCA  business needs my affordable operations manual.



 1.  My Affordable Care Management operations manual through a monthly subscription will create and maintain the highest quality of gold standard service /products in your business.

 

2. My Low-Cost Care Management Operations  Manual through a monthly subscription, becomes the primary tool for training your employees.

3.  My Care Management operations manual through a monthly subscription, creates more time for the owner, by giving you written procedures for your business.

 

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5. With my Affordable Care Management Manual through a monthly subscription,you can make your care management agency more scalable to easily expand and grow your to a second office as the manual gives you a turnkey operation.

6. With my Care Management Manual through a monthly subscription, you Can Sell your GCM Business atTwice the Amount.

Find out more 

Filed Under: Aging, Aging Life Care, aging life care manager, Blog, Care Management Products, care management start-up, elder care manager, Families, GCM Operations Manual, GCM Start -Up, GCM subscription model, Geriatric Care Management Business, Geriatric Care Manager, geriatric social worker, nurse advocate, nurse care manager, Operations Manual, START UP Tagged With: 5th edition GCM OPERATIONS MANUAL, affordable Care Management Manual, aging family, aging life and geraitric care manager, aging life care manager, aging life care start up, aging life or geriatric care manager, aging parent care, aging parent crisis, black american geriatric care managers, black american social workers, Black Entrepreneurs, Black geriatric care managers, Black Nurse Entrepreneurs, Black RN's, Black start-up geriatric care management, Black travel nurses, business start up, care manager, case manager, GCM Operations Manual, GCM Subscription Plan, geriatric care manager, low-cost operations manual, My Geriatric Care Management Operations Manual, nurse advocate, nurse care manager, start -up elder business, start-up aging business, Subscription Model

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