We are creeping towards to August which means often seeing our midlife siblings at more summer vacation events. At times we are estranged from midlife sibling or we are polite at a family gathering but there is no real connection.siblings
Aging life or geriatric care managers are care connectors. They cannot do everything themselves for the family , like be the best geriatrician, accountant or home health aide nor do they have the skills to do that. What they have is the skill to connect to the right resource, like a geriatrician , elder-law attorney , support group or home health aide, especially for a family caregiver.
Emotional resources can link a circle of care for the direct family caregiver. These emotional supports could and should include adult siblings .Siblings are the longest and deepest relationship in any person’s life. Reconnecting midlife or aging brother’s and sisters, through the circle of care, is a critical GCM task but to achieve this, the care manager may have to depend his clinical skills in helping siblings with forgiveness or reconnecting siblings who live long distance.
Midlife siblings have often spent the last 30 years tending to their own families .So the point of reconnection with middle aged brothers and sisters often happens when they are still working or just retiring — unexpectedly thrown into a crisis in parent care.
This is where the GCM needs to have clinical skills to can help with healing this sibling disconnection-often short circuited by an old sibling wound that helping the sister and brother work together as a circle of care . You replace the shorted fuse in the fuse box.
If the family is dysfunctional, the care manager becomes a care connector and links the right resources that might include an mediator who specializes in aging families or a Marriage and Family Therapist who specializes in Aging (hard to find)
If you are a geriatric care manager or therapist,you can find chapters on mediation, working with the nearly normal family and dysfunctional aging family, siblings, family meetings and care connection Handbook of Geriatric Care Management 4th ed. for help in all these areas.
It may be 4 months away till Thanksgiving but a an aging parent crisis could happen tomorrow. Reach Out now for help.