Cathy Cress

Expert in Aging Life and Geriatric Care Management

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Make Reminiscence a Valentines Gift for Aging Clients- 5 Ways

February 9, 2023

Make Reminiscence a Valentine’s Gift

Make reminiscence Valentine’s gift for clients.  A great Valentine’s for your client is you the care manager or a caregiver, using reminiscence to gather a client’s memories.

Reminiscence isn’t new. Before the printing press, storytellers and bards were how history was recorded-

You can watch The History Channel to get a history of the world. But History also exists in a family, and you can make your elder family members oral storytellers on Valentine’s Day.

Storytelling only works if the teller remembers the lines. Family history has to be captured when the older person still remembers. So holiday events are a perfect time to tap into that font before it flickers.

Here are some tips to use if you want to capture these family tales during Valentine’s visits with older clients—a perfect time to do this.

1. First, arrive with a real Valentine’s card Just a card that can evoke old memories

2. Reminiscence is Valentine’s gift when you use empathetic listening Make all the messages you give the older person— tone, how fast you speak, how they are sitting- say, “I want to listen to you.” This in itself is a gift to an older person as few people really listen to them as they age.

Reminiscence is Valentine’s gift

3. Reminiscence is Valentine’s gift when you ask questions that prompt the story but don’t make judgments. If there are going to record the family tale,  on your I phone, record it in a way that doesn’t distract or stop the older person from talking.

Reminiscence is Valentine’s gift

4. Reminiscence is the perfect Valentine’s gift when viewing old family photos as memory prompts.

5. Start somewhere. If the elder isn’t going to tell stories on his or her own, start the story and see if they will follow along.” Did you go to Valentine’s parties as when you were a kid or celebrate the day in school by exchanging valentines?” Did you have a special valentine as a teenager or young adult?”

6. If the client has dementia you can still do this with reminiscence prompts like a valentine, chocolate, some flowers, old photos, or a simple valentine decoration you bring.

7. Or contact the family, if they will visit or call, and teach them how to do reminiscence and do this each holiday they may spend with the older loved one.

 

8. Use technology tools to help you with this legacy building for your older client like Life Bio-    or

Quick Voice Recorder

to catch the memory on your phone.

Story Worth

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How Storytelling at Thanksgiving Can Give Elders A Happier Family Holiday

November 22, 2022

Want to increase aging parents’ and everyone’s enjoyment at Thanksgiving? Try storytelling at Thanksgiving using elders’ memories.

As an aging professional, you can bring joy to an older person  through reminiscence, storytelling, and oral history for elders

This Thanksgiving, if you really do travel to a family home or grandma’s house, travel safely  If not make the safest choice, stay home and  use Zoom and include your elderly

 

parent. You can do oral history for elders if they can use a computer or have a family member or friend who visits often and who lives nearby and is in their bubble serve and share Thanksgiving dinner at their home and use zoom with them to see other family members on the holiday.

Share Your Thanksgiving Story

If you are at a family member’s holiday dinner and use reminiscence for elders by asking everyone to tell their favorite story about a Thanksgiving dinner. Start with midlife members to get the idea and then ask

 

again parents to share their stories.

Oral history for elders will bring extra thanks to Thanksgiving by learning about an elder’s past and giving them the opportunity to share, which sometimes they do not do in the hubbub of family talking.

  The “telling ” also means someone documents. That magically gives the elder and a child social interaction and connectedness. Elders vividly recall their past by telling stories from vignettes in their life – especially life in their 20’s, which sparks the richest recall called the “20’s bump”, according to researchers.

Elders sharing stories means passing on history.

So try storytelling at  Thanksgiving and it becomes intergenerational. The older person is given a chance to give the larger picture of their life and family history to children and grandchildren or extended family, who may not have heard all the details of their grandparent’s or parent’s life before. My 10 grandchildren have grown up with their now 80-year-old grandfather. telling them exciting stories of when he was a California Highway patrolman. So a dual dose of a higher quality of life for both the older person and the aging family is increased through oral history and reminiscence.

Capture Your Families Past Before It Is Gone

 

 Many midlife adults now do ancestry and regret that they did not ask questions of older family members when they were alive. Capture that past now on this family holiday. An aging professional or a geriatric care manager can suggest family or friends record the Thanksgiving story as oral history using technology like an i Phone or i Pad.

Story Telling at Thanksgiving  with Story Worth

Another great idea to capture reminiscence for elders is giving them StoryWorth. 

 

My daughter sent this gift to her Dad and both he and I love it. Each week  StoryWorth sends a question to my husband that prompts him to write about his past. He writes his reminiscence out longhand and I easily use the dictation on my phone and email his story to Story Worth.

At the end of the year, my daughter will order a bound book of all the stories- a whole collection of memories, an oral history of an elder father that she might never think to ask and will be saved for her and her children to pass on family history. I will order a copy for all her three siblings. Equally important, my husband, really enjoyed writing about his past and the prompts have brought many vivid memories back to him.

Sweet grandmother holding a beautifully cooked turkey dinner.

 

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Reminiscence on Memorial Day- Serve it to Elders Along With Hamburgers

May 26, 2022

Reminiscence on Memorial Day

What is Reminiscence- It  isn’t new-It’s how history was recorded-

Oral storytellers gave us the Odyssey and other valiant tales. Ulysses and Penelope may be coming to your Memorial Day Barbecue this coming weekend.

Reminiscence on Memorial Day

But storytelling only works if the teller remembers the lines. Family history has to be captured when the older person still remembers. So holiday events are a perfect time to tap into that font before it flickers.

Tips to Capture Elders’s Stories

Here are some tips to use if they want to capture these family tales during Memorial Day weekend with aging parents—a perfect time to do this. If you are gathering at a memorial day barbeque, ask, older family members how they celebrated the holiday that begins supper, when they were young.

Then use empathetic listening.What is empathetic listening? Make all the messages you are giving the older person— tone, how fast you speak, how they are sitting- say, “I want to listen to you

What is Reminiscence-Asking questions that prompt the story

But don’t make judgments. If there are going to record the family tale, do it in a way that doesn’t distract or stop the older person from talking.

Start somewhere. If the elder isn’t going to tell stories on his or her own, start the story.

See if they will follow along.” Did you go to Memorial Day parades when you were a kid or march in one after the war ( pick his war)?” Did your parents have barbecues to start the summer ?”. “What was it like being drafted? Where did you serve?  

 

Music is just next to memory in the brain.

 Alive Inside can be used for elders with dementia. So 50’s Rock and Roll, Little Richard, Bill Haley, and if they are older the Four Freshman. Play elder’s music at your event and ask older vets or their wives or widows for stories of the Vietnam War, Korean War, or Iraq.

 Two technology tools to help you with Reminiscence for your older client

Story Worth    

Story Worth is a legacy-building tool that can help families create a book of memories through weekly easy prompts of questions to ask the older person to create a weekly story about their life resulting in a book after one Year. My daughter gifted it to her Dad and he and the whole family loved the legacy book that was created

 

Quick Voice Recorder to catch the memory on your phone and used Dictation to transcribe the memories into written word to print.

Check out my Book Handbook of Geriatric Care Management with more tools for legacy building written by David Lindeman Director Of the Center for Technology at UC Berkeley and Julie Menack of 21 st Care Solutions

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What are 8 Spiritual Quality Of Life Activities for Elders During the Holidays ?

December 6, 2021

Spirituality Helps Elder Quality of Life Skyrocket  With on Holidays

Spirituality helps elders’ quality of life. As you age, spirituality can matter more. Now that we are entering a season of high spiritual celebrations like Christmas, Hanukkah, Orthodox Christmas, Feast day – Our

Lady of Guadalupe- this is the most important season to involve elders who wish to be in spiritual communities. Religious communities offer socialization thus the quality of life to so many elders and can return joy to their lives.So you must learn how to find an elder’s holiday joy.

 

Religion Comes in a Filing Cabinet

The idea that spirituality helps elders’ quality of life was taught to me by Leonie Nowitz, a geriatric care manager who has a deep interest in spirituality and writes about it often, once told me to look at spirituality as a question  ” What is this all about”. As we age this question becomes primal, as we face death coming at a rapid pace. We wonder- do I go to heaven, to hell, or just energy or dust. Will I meet angels- my wife in heaven.?

Ms. Nowitz said that when you define religion, look at it as a filing cabinet with each drawer is a religion with it’s an answer to spirituality  ” “What Is this all About”. There is one for Jews, Protestants, Hindu’s Muslims, Quakers, The Environment- all religions and belief systems.

 

How to Find An Elder’s Holiday Joy

Learning how to find an elder’s holiday joy, is a key skill for care managers. One assessment care managers can do is a Quality of Life assessment to find out how and where joy can be found again.  If spirituality is something that would increase an elders’ quality of life, here are some activities that you may suggest to an older client or their family, especially on holidays when places of worship have their most spectacular music, smells, and bells, and pageantry.

Spiritual Quality of Life Activities During Holidays

  1. If an older person appears isolated and is unable to attend their place of worship, especially on holidays, because of not driving or disability, and they wish to still join a congregation, contact the head of the religious group and ask if members could transport him or if they have a van service or arrange for members to transport them to services. If they cannot get out ask if the spiritual leader or congregation members would make home visits.
  2. If an older person is not now a part of a religious group but what once was and has some interest in returning, holidays are the best times to reconnect. Contact the head of the religious group and ask him/her to make a home visit and the care manager follow up with transportation arrangements to holiday services if yes.
  3. If an older client has had a recent close relative or friend die and wishes to return to a spiritual group she knew before, connect them, with the congregation they are familiar with for solace or grieving.
  4. If an older person moves to a new area and is part of a religious group connect them to the same religion and place of worship in the new town and arrange transportation  to holiday services and a new member to greet them
  5. If an older person has dementia if possible reconnect him or her with his spiritual background through familiar prayer, music, etc.  
  6. If an elder has dementia and can attend services without being disruptive, arrange for a caregiver to take them as they can still be drawn in  by the ” Smells and Bells’
  7. If you have a homebound client who wishes to return to a religious group, reconnect them by arranging, in their,  holiday spiritual music, religious icons (a rosary or image, for example), readings from a sacred text about their own religion on Hannakka or Christmas, watching a service on television, listening to one on the radio or via computer.
  8. Decorate their room with holiday decoration that represents their own religious holiday like a Menorah, Christmas tree, a nativity scene, etc.

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Filed Under: Aging, Aging Family, Aging Life Care, aging life care manager, Blog, care manager, case manager, Dementia Activities, Dementia and Spirituality, elder care manager, Families, Geriatric Care Manager, geriatric care manager, geriatric social worker, nurse advocate, nurse care manager, Quality of Life, Spiritual Quality of Life Tagged With: aging life care manager, assessing for quality of life, care manager, case manager, demential and spirituality, geriatric care manager, nurse care manager, spirital assessment, spiritual assessment, spiritual supports in aging, spirituality in aging

How Does Atul Gawande View Quality of Life in Dying ?

September 15, 2021

 

   A good life to the very end 

Atul Gawande’s acclaimed book, “Being Mortal“ opened our eyes to the medical way of death. He showed millions of readers how the quality of life and human interaction while dying trump the number of years gained through questionable painful procedures and dying in an institution.

He tells us that “our ultimate, goal, after, is not a good death but a good life to the very end

 

Quality of Life Can Be There to the End of Life

GCM Nina Herndon brings you that same quality of life message- about dying –where an elder can still live the end of life with joy. Her chapter “Supporting Clients’ Quality of Life: Drawing on Community, Informal Networks, and Care Manager Creativity” in the Handbook of Geriatric Care Management 4th edition is a geriatric care management Nina has devoted her career to giving elders a care plan for a happy life and a happy life to the very end.

 Bringing Joy in the here and now of Dying

 Bringing joy in the here and now of dying can be done through using quality of life tools- Spiritual, emotional, intellectual, creative, and physical quality of life. Increasing the spiritual quality of life can mean for a person is dying and wishes to return to a spiritual group she knew before, connecting them to the faith they are familiar with. Even homebound clients can have visits from members of a religious community or a prelate. They can have hymns sung, prayers said or whatever religious ritual their spiritual group follows, like communion, at home. Care providers can be trained to engage them by reading religious texts or playing hymns.

The Power Reminiscence at End of Life

Spirituality can be the environment. I once had a client who was in a nursing home dying of cancer and wanted to go home to die with hospice and 24-hour care. Hisgrandma_holding_rosary_shutterstock_40017103-255x255.jpg spirituality was the environment and he had been a lead volunteer to build a trail in Santa Clara California from Los Gatos up the steep winding highway 17 over the Santa Cruz mountains to the Lexington Reservoir. He had no family so the care manager asked the volunteers he had worked with if they would visit him at his home. They happily agreed and 300 volunteers took shifts, 24 hours a day to sit with him reminisce, tell stories and sing while he died over several weeks. This is what joy that bringing a spiritual quality of life can offer in dying.

Tools for Reminicance at End of Life

Friends emailing short personal videos with good wishes and memories, that a family member can show on a phone or computer- can bring emotional joy at end of life. Sending notes, not of condolences but great memories can be a salve to dying. Volunteering to give respite to family members, if visiting is allowed during COVID or post the pandemic, can give an opportunity to share old memories or look at old photos and give family respite. You may have thought those old photo albums should be dumped but they can bring the joy of reminiscence if shared at end of life or with seniors at any time.

 

 

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