Cathy Cress

Expert in Aging Life and Geriatric Care Management

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Dysfunctional Aging Family Adult Children Who Call You Where You Need Clinical Skills

August 22, 2023

3 Types of Dysfunctional Aging Family Children Calls

Where You Need Clinical Skills

# 1 Inquiry from a Narcissistic Adult Children

in  Aging Dysfunctional Family

Dysfunctional adult children who inquire about your services can be a tough sell. First, let’s- consider The narcissistic adult child from an aging dysfunctional family who calls for help and has an “it’s all about me” attitude. The aging parent and or a midlife sibling could be narcissists. With aging parents, all siblings may have resented this self-absorption of their family their entire lives and have a love/hate relationship with older parents. Siblings, the other brothers, and sisters resent this, especially with parent care.  The self-absorbed sibling either does not participate in solving sibling or aging family troubles but just makes them worse. They call after a disastrous holiday event like the coming  Labor Day family gathering and you need clinical skills to work with them

#2 Inquiry from Devalued Child Entitled but Servile Adult.

 

Dysfunctional adult children who call you about your services can include devalued adult children from the aging dysfunctional family calls you, you need clinical skills to work with them. 

As a kid, the adult child of a narcissistic parent was devalued in the parent’s eyes so that the now aging parent can feel superior and powerful in the world. These children mature into adults who are emotionally impoverished, inflexible, and needy.

As a geriatric care manager, the adult child presents as entitled. As clients, these adult children fear that unless they make inflexible demands, they will receive nothing. “ Get my mother into a concierge wing of a hospital by tomorrow”

An adult child of a narcissistic aging parent will present as nasty, aggressive, and devaluing of the service provider. Or they could be essentially insatiable and easily injured by the helping professional. The adult children of narcissistic entitled families are also often angry and frustrated at having to give care to a parent or parents whom they experienced as ungiving, demanding, intrusive, overpowering, and needy. They are members of an ultra-dysfunctional aging family. They call after a visit to aging parents and you need clinical skills to work with them 

# 3-Inquiry from Needy Adult Children in the Dysfunctional Aging Family

 The adult child who calls may be the needy adult child. Baby boomers must evolve beyond the needy child he or she has been, depending on aging parents’ fiscal,

emotional, and social support, to the adult who supports his parent. Adult Children of aging parents in the 21st century not only confront the delay of their own needs when their parent’s aging and reliance call them but confront their own future and very much more immediate loss of the central figure in their lives, their own parents.

Some don’t- especially in the dysfunctional aging family.

These adults feel starved for parental affection they never received and often seek affection from professionals and other people in their lives to compensate for the care they didn’t receive as children. They call after the holiday and you need clinical skills to work with them. 

These 3  types of adult children have clinical difficulties that are coping and defense mechanisms allowing them to adapt to a dysfunctional family. The care manager must enter the family system clinically to address the needs symptoms and defenses of the adult children to get care for the elder.

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Taming HBO Succession

11 Vital Clinical Tools For Dysfunctional Families

 

             Thursday, September 19

02:00 PM Pacific Time (US and Canada)

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  Give frantic adult children hope when they desperately call this summer after they see their failing parent.  

 Join me and learn to clinically rescue concierge dysfunctional families made a summer visit to floundering Mom or Dad.      

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Understand the Dysfunctional Aging Family System you must enter to get care for elders
Understand 11 Warning Signs You Are Working with Dysfunctional Family

Master 10 Clinical Tools Professionals Must Learn Before They Work with These Difficult Families
Learn how to solve dysfunctional family problems after you master these tools
Get care for aging family members when the dysfunctional family members resist
Learn how to work with characters like Rupert Murdock & Logan Roy

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Find out more in the YouTube for My YouTube, Channel  Geriatric Care 1

t

 

 

Find out more in the YouTube for My YouTube, Channel  Geriatric Care 1

 

Filed Under: Adult Child Pain, adult child pain-point, Adult Child Stress, Adult children, Aging, aging family crisis, aging family system, Aging Life Care, Aging Life Care Assocaition, aging life care manager, Aging therapist, black care manager, black concieirge nurse, black concierge care manager, black concierge RN, Black Entrepreneur, Black entrepreneurs, Black Geriatric Care Manager, Black geriatric care managers, black travel nurse, Black Travel Nurses, Black Travel RN, Blog, borderline-narcissistic families, Clinical Tools Dysfunctional family, Concierge aging clients, Concierge caregivers, Devalued adult child, Dysfunctional aging family, Dysfunctional Family Inquiry, Dysfunctional Family System, elder fiscal abuse, Entited Family, Families, FREE WEBINAR, GCM Clinical Tools, Geriatric Care Management Business, Geriatric Care Manager, geriatric social worker, Narcissistic adult child, Needy Adult Child, nurse advocate, nurse care manager Tagged With: aging dysfunctional family, aging family, aging life care manager, black american geriatric care managers, Black Entrepreneurs, Black geriatric care managers, Black Nurse Entrepreneurs, care manager, Clinical Tool dysfunctional family, Clinical Tools for Aging Family, Devalued Adult Child, dysfunctional, Entitled Adult Children, Entitled aging client, Entitled Family, free webinar, geriatric care managers, Ivanka Trump, Needy Adult Child, nurse advocate, nurse care manager, parent care crisis, Tools with Dysfunctional families

Ten Warning Signs You Are Working With a Dysfunctional Family

August 8, 2023

Working with Dysfunctional Family

Ten Warning Signs you are Working with Dysfunctional Family represents critical information to share with long-distance caregivers before their holiday visit. Do you know them? They include contentiousness, anger, and cut off and all are listed below. These clinical issues give the visiting caregiver signs that they need to call a care manager and you the care manager the most challenging job of an aging professional. What you have to know is family system theory and be clinically skilled in entering this treacherous family system – to get care for an older person

1. Contentiousness – Old fights erupt; the siblings and parents get into arguments with one another about an old issue

2. Anger – Siblings and family members express physical anger, emotional abuse, financial abuse

3. Distancing & cut off – Some siblings or parents have nothing to do with family and may not speak to parents or siblings for long periods of time.

Ten Warning Signs You are Working with the  Dysfunctional Family – Fusion, Denial, Triangulation, Entitlement

4. Fusion – Siblings and family members, such as the mother and eldest daughter, blend into one another, For example, the daughter sounds, acts, and has the same prejudices as the mother. . Think of the media’s portrayal of Lindsay Lohan and her mother.

5. Denial – Adult siblings do not see a decline in a parent, do not face reality, and do not take care of parent if he or she needs care.                           

6. Triangulation – Tension between two family members or siblings causes one to enlist a third family member or sibling to avoid change For example, two adult sibling object to the cost of care of an aging parent. They gang up on the third adult sibling who thinks the cost of care is reasonable and justified.

7. Sense of Entitlement – Siblings who are accustomed to purchasing services need not personally solve their own, children’s siblings or parents’ problems. This lack of engagement leaves them, unprepared and unwilling in getting involved in solving family tribulations.

Ten Warning Signs You Are Working with a Dysfunctional Family – Narcissism, Needy Adult Siblings, Substance Abuse, and Cut Off

8. Narcissism – One or more siblings has an “it’s all about me” attitude and

other siblings resent this. The self-absorbed sibling either does not participate

9. Needy Adult Siblings – These adult siblings feel starved for affection and often seek affection from professionals and other people in their lives for compensation for the care they didn’t receive as children.

10 . Substance and Other Abuse – The family and siblings have a history of drug, alcohol, and/or child abuse.

If this fits you you and your aging parent needs care may need to contact a geriatric care manager.

SIGN UP FOR MY HOLIDAY WEBINAR –

 

Get Ready for the Holiday Rush

Get Ready for the Holiday Rush

WEDNESDAY, November 16th, 2022, FROM 2 PM – 3:30 PM PST

 Learn how to create!

  • Pre-Holiday Social media campaigns to reach worried caregivers
  • Pre- Holiday-Materials about the warning signs that a parent needs help
  • Pre-Holiday Marketing to help you sign up families who might face a serious decline in aging parents
  • How to sell services to desperate post-holiday callers from Normal dysfunctional & long-distance family
  • How to use tools to contain holiday chaos & arrange care in festive family fright
  • How to move the family to New Year’s stability
  • Know The Ten Warning Signs you are working with a dysfunctional family and position Your Agency ahead of Care Managers who do not have great pre-holiday marketing campaigns and lack the clinical skills how to work with Adult Children and families during the chaotic aging family holiday visit when adult kids find their aging parents need care
  • Featuring

 Cathy Cress MSW author of the Handbook of Geriatric Care

Management     

Find Out More 

 

 

 

  • Find out more in the YouTube for My YouTube, Channel  Geriatric Care 1

 

 

Filed Under: abusive aging parents, adult child physical abuse, Adult children, aging family crisis, aging family system, Aging Life Care, Aging Life Care Assocaition, Aging therapist, Dysfunctional aging family, Dysfunctional Family Inquiry, Dysfunctional Family System, elder abuse, elder care manager, elder fiscal abuse, elder mediator, entitled family, estranged siblings, FREE WEBINAR, GCM COACHING SKILLS, geriatric care manager, geriatric care manager start up, midlife siblings, Siblings Tagged With: adult children of borderline narcissistic VIP families, aging family, black american geriatric care managers, black american social workers, Black Entrepreneurs, Black geriatric care managers, Black RN's, Black start-up geriatric care management, Black travel nurses, blaming familiy members, boundaries dysfunctional families, Clinical Tools Dysfunctional Holiday, cut -off, cut-off sibling, dysfunctional aging family, geriatric care manager, help with dysfunctional family, midlife siblings, Narcissistic Personality, sibling, Substance abuse in the elderly

Are You Giving Holiday Thanks to Your Employees?

December 12, 2022

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 Are You Giving Holiday Thanks to Your Employees?

Giving holiday thanks to your employees for their work during the holidays is key to being a good employer. Christmas and Hannakka are coming up when we offer thanks to our friends, loved ones, and family. But what about thanking your employees this holiday month? How will you thank your employees, the very people that power your business and profit and may be on call for you right now on New Year?

A holiday party  after hours catered  or  just  ordering pizza plus buying bottles of wine, and nonalcoholic beverages then having a white elephant exchange  hat can be fun and affordable

But if that is not in your plan here are Ideas for inexpensive but really appreciated gifts to thank your employees – this holiday season. Consider gift cards to grocery stores or department stores, or a gift certificate from Amazon all given with a nice personal handwritten note.

Thank Your Staff

How To Thank Staff  All Year

1. Thank your staff all year long for having the amount of productivity to keep the business thriving. Handwriting is not a lost art. It sends a message that you take the time, personally, to really celebrate what the employees do for your business.

2. Giving Holiday Thanks to Your Employees could be sending a handwritten thank-you note to thank your employees, to each staff member during the year applauding something they did. Be grateful by thanking your staff for something specific may be the ultimate reward. If you do it selectively yet authentically, a thank you note may be pinned above your employee’s desk for years. Create a formal letter recognizing your employee’s achievement. Sign it and use the company’s seal to give the letter something extra. If you really want to do it right, frame it.

3. Thank your staff by naming an employee of the month, each month in your newsletter with their picture. Give them a gift GCM-pix-3.jpgto tell them you are grateful for their hard work. Create a formal letter recognizing your employee’s achievement. Sign it and use the company’s seal to give the letter something extra. To thank your employees right, frame it too.

4. Giving holidays thanks to your employees,  if you do feel safe, could be hosting an in-person party,If you do not feel it is covid safe, try a virtual employee holiday party and mail gifts ahead of time to all employees for being such excellent care managers all year. If it is late now so try New Year.

5. When the COVID level in your area is safe enough to gather,  thank your employees, plan employee picnics, birthday parties, and anniversary parties to thank them publicly throughout the year.

6. B.J Curry- Spitler, one of the first and I might say the greatest care managers, founded Age Concerns in San Diego in 1982. and knew how to be grateful to her staff. She was a master at thanking her staff.  To thank her employees, she gave gifts of massages to her care managers. A brilliant gift, a massage recognizes the tough emotional work that care managers do and their need to take care of themselves- which you as their employer are doing

 

This winter 90% of those who die of Covid will be over 65 . January is the deadliest month in the U.S. according to an analysis of the CDC Wonder database.

Understand End of Life this winter

Sign -up for my Upcoming Free Webinar Deliver a Good End of Life 9 Steps to Death &Dying

Jan 24, 2023, 02:00 PM Pacific Time (US and Canada)

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 Description

Deliver a Good End of Life- 9 Steps to Add Death and Dying to Your Care Management Agency

Deliver a Good End of Life

Serve Your Client until Death Do You Part
Join me on January 24 2023 and learn why End of Life Services re a perfect new service for care managers

Deliver a Good End of Life

Learn to guide the patient/family through the five stages of death. Understand how to help clients be active participants in their care. Give the family caregivers tools to manage care. Find out how to provide family-centered care to caregivers and families. Learn to choose the right support services for the client through all stages of death.
Introduce Hospice and Palliative care to the client earlier and work with their team.
Find out how to use COVID -19 family coaching for GCM. Discover the role of Death Doula at end of life.

Time

Jan 24, 2023, 02:00 PM Pacific Time (US and Canada)

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Sign -Up Even if you cannot attend & receive the recording the next day 

 

     

 

     

Filed Under: Aging, Aging Life Care Assocaition, aging life care manager, Black Aging Family, Black Entrepreneur, Black Entrepreneur RB, Black Entrepreneur RN, Black entrepreneurs, Black Geriatric Care Manager, Black RN, Black Travel Nurses, Clinical Tools Dysfunctional families, Cut-Off, Dysfunctional Family & Holidays, Dysfunctional Family System, Families, GCM Webinar, Geriatric Care Management Business, Geriatric Care Manager, Holiday on call, Holiday season, News, nurse advocate, nurse care manager, on-call staff, Thanking staff, Thanksgiving, THANKSGIVING BLOG, Therapist Specializing in Aging Tagged With: aging family, aging family Christmas, aging life care manager, Aging Mom on Christmas, aging parent crisis, care manager, case manager, Christmas, eldercare, GCM on call, geriatric care manager, Holiday Staff thank you, Holidays calls to GCM's, nurse advocate, nurse care manager, staff on call on Christmas, start-up eldercare, Thank employees, Thank Staff all year, Thank You, thanking staff on Christmas, Thanks staff

Adult Sibling Rivalry at Thanksgiving- Where To Get Help?

October 25, 2022

A sad woman crying as she prays.

Siblings are The Biggest Source Of Stress Between Human Beings

At family rituals, like Thanksgiving next month, adult siblings often are often brought back together. If you are one- will it be a happy feast or wrecked by holiday sibling rivalry??

 

Sibling Rivalry Can Give Acid Reflux to Grandma’s Thanksgiving Dinner

As Gail Sheehy said in her book, Passages in Caregiving, we think that siblings will automatically support each other when aging parents fall apart. Sheehy quotes sociologists, Karl Pillemer and J. Jill Suitor, on sibling rivalry, in a study they did conclude that siblings are inherent rivals and the biggest source of stress between human beings.

If you are a midlife sibling, perhaps you have a brother or sister to whom you hardly speak because of sibling rivalry. Maybe you are about to see your siblings at the coming Thanksgiving feast, even on zoom during COVID, and anticipate largely ignoring him or her or doing chitchat as you seethe the inside. If you fit this description of sibling rivalry, you are in the same lurching boat as uncounted baby boomer siblings all over the world.

 

Childhood Wound Ripped Open

That wound from childhood may still ache enough to keep you on the furrowed path your family followed when you were young. Now, however, you and your adult siblings, nearing or at retirement age, may need to come together again to be part of a niece or

adult siblings need to come together for aging parents

 

 

nephew’s wedding or christening, help plan a parent’s anniversary dinner, or, most important, oversee the increasing care of elderly family members.

Best Thanksgiving Sibling Rivalry Film

I suggest you watch Pieces of April, a fabulous Thanksgiving film ( lead 21-year-old Katy Holmes debuts in a standout performance) where the film’s dysfunctional family revolves around adult sibling rivalry. The film is also about interracial couples, and in the end, around a catastrophic illness of the aging parent, where the siblings need to resolve their differences. It also makes it a trifecta with dementia. The grandmother, who has dementia is taken out of her nursing home to join the dysfunctional Thanksgiving feast and offers surprising sanity to the sibling-rivalry drama.

If you recognize this problem in your own family, seek counseling before coming the holidays engulf you. Contact the Aging Life Care Association to find help before a parental crisis.

SIGN UP FOR MY HOLIDAY WEBINAR –

holiday sibling rivalry

Get Ready for the Holiday Rush

WEDNESDAY, November 16th, 2022, FROM 2 PM – 3:30 PM PST

 Learn how to create!

  • Pre-Holiday Social media campaigns to reach worried caregivers
  • Pre- Holiday-Materials about the warning signs that a parent needs help
  • Pre-Holiday Marketing to help you sign up families who might face a serious decline in aging parents
  • How to sell services to desperate post-holiday callers from Normal dysfunctional & long-distance family
  • How to use tools to contain holiday chaos & arrange care in festive family fright
  • How to move the family to New Year’s stability
  • Position Your Agency ahead of Care Managers who do not have great pre-holiday marketing campaigns and lack the clinical skills how to work with Adult Children and families during the chaotic aging family holiday visit when adult kids find their aging parents need care
  • Featuring

 Cathy Cress MSW author of the Handbook of Geriatric Care

Management        

 

  • Featuring Speaker

 Cathy Cress MSW author of the Handbook of Geriatric Care

Management        

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THIS FREE WEBINAR IS Tuesday, November 16th, 2021, FROM 2 PM – 3:30 PM PST

Sign Up Now

Free Webinar

 

 

 

Find out more about dysfunctional families and sibling rivalry from My YouTube, Channel  

 

 

Filed Under: ADULT SIBling, Aging, Aging Life Care, aging life care manager, Aging therapist, ALCA Dysfuntional Family Help, Black Aging Family, Black Entrepreneur, Black Entrepreneur RB, Black Entrepreneur RN, Black entrepreneurs, Black Geriatric Care Manager, Black geriatric care managers, Black RN, Black Travel Nurses, Black Travel RN, Blog, Clinical Tools Dysfunctional family, Cut Off, Dysfunctional aging family, Dysfunctional Family & Holidays, Dysfunctional Family Inquiry, Dysfunctional Family System, Families, Filial Crisis, FREE WEBINAR, Geriatric Care Management Business, geriatric social worker, Holiday Meltdown in Aging Family, Holiday Sibling Rivalry, nurse care manager, SIBLING, sibling rivalry, sibling sharing care, Sibling Strife Christmas, Sibling Strife Holidays, Sibling Strife Thanksgiving, Social Media, Social Media for Care managers, Social Media Holidays, Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving & dysfunctional family, THANKSGIVING BLOG, Thanksgiving Parent crisis, Thanksgving visits during COVID, Therapist Specializing in Aging Tagged With: adult sibling, adult sibling conflict, adult sibling estrangement, aging life care on holidays, aging parent crisis on holiday, Aging siblings, Black, black aging family, black american geriatric care managers, black american social workers, Black Entrepreneurs, Black Nurse Entrepreneurs, care manager marketing, celebrations with siblings, cut-off sibling, Dydsfunctual Family Holiday, dysfunctual family, Dysfunctual siblings, Holiday Crisis For Aging Family, Holiday Marketing, Holiday marketing Plan, Holiday Rush, Holiday sibling rivalry, Holidays with midlife siblings, Home care marketing, irate siblings, Prepare for holiday rush, sibling conflict, sibling rivalry, siblings, Thansgiving sibling rivalry

FREE HOLIDAY WEBINAR- BEAT HOLIDAY RUSH -One Day Left to Sign -up

November 15, 2021

One Day Left to sign up for my free webinar to beat Holiday Rush

HURRY- UP and  SIGN UP FOR MY FREE HOLIDAY WEBINAR

 

Get Ready for the Holiday Rush

SIGN UP NOW!
Tomorrow November 16th 2021 @2PM-3:30

 Learn!

  • How to  create Pre-Holiday Social media campaigns to reach worried caregivers

     

  • How to create Pre- Holiday-Materials about the warning signs that a parent needs help
  • How to usePre-Holiday Technology to help you move people from discovery to signing on the dotted line
  • How to sell services to desperate post-holiday callers from Normal dysfunctional & long-distance family
  • How to use tools to contain Holiday chaos & arrange care in festive family fright
  • How to move the family to New Year’s stability
  • Position Your Agency ahead of Care Managers who do not have great pre-holiday social media and marketing campaigns. Get ahead  of competitors who lack the clinical skills how to work with Adult Children and families during the chaotic aging family holiday visit when adult kids find their aging parents need care  
  •  
  • Featuring Speakers

 Cathy Cress MSW author of the Handbook of Geriatric Care

Management       

 

 

 

 

 

Natasha Beauchamp- MSc, Webmaster and Research    Scientist at Elder Pages Online, LLC

 

THIS FREE WEBINAR IS Tuesday, November 16th, 2021, FROM 2 PM – 3:30 PM PST

Sign Up Now

 

 


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Filed Under: Aging, Aging technology, ALCA Concierge, ALCA Marketing, Black Aging Family, Black Entrepreneur, Black Entrepreneur RB, Black Entrepreneur RN, Black entrepreneurs, Black Geriatric Care Manager, Black geriatric care managers, Black RN, Black Travel Nurses, Blog, Care management, Caregiver Stress, Clinical Tools Dysfunctional families, complementary consultatiom, Cut Off, Dysfunctional Family System, Families, FREE WEBINAR, GCM Start-Up, GCM Webinar, Geriatric Care Management Business, geriatric care manager, Geriatric Care Manager, geriatric social worker, Holiday Meltdown in Aging Family, Holiday Rush for care managers, Holiday Rush Technology, Holiday season, Holiday Sibling Rivalry, Holiday Social Media, Holiday Webinar, Holidays, inquiry from adult child, Long Distance travel Holidays, Natasha Beauchamp, nurse advocate, nurse care manager, POST HOLIDAY CALLS, POST HOLIDAY SEASON, Post holidays aging dysfunctional family, Sibling Strife Holidays, Social Media for eldercare, Social Media Holidays, social media marketing, social media marketing campaign, Technology for Geriatric Care Managers, Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving with Dysfuntional Family, Webinar, Webinar ALCA GCM Tagged With: aging family, aging life care manager, aging parent care, aging parent crisis, aging parent crisis on holiday, care manager, case manager, Dysfuntional family on holidays, Free Webinar geriatric care management, geriatric care manager, Holiday Crisis For Aging Family, Holidays calls to GCM's, marketing plam holiday, Nearly Normal family inquiry holidays, nurse advocate, nurse care manager, Social Media for holidays, technology for holidays, Webinar ALCA

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